Interview
Why do you write?
The world of creative writing is relatively new to me. It begins with a birthday gift from my husband Bill, who often said, “you got to write your stories down.” Five years ago, he took charge and enrolled me in my first creative writing class— a memoir workshop taught by Meredith Hall through Maine Writers and Publishers Alliance (MWPA). This class launched my journey to capture the stories of my family. It begins with a name, Millefoglie, a poetic name bestowed on my great-grandfather by nuns in an orphanage in Sicily. Three generations of men carried this name from Sicilian to American shores, venturing as stowaways and steerage class passengers, destined for a life at sea. Millefoglie, the name I carry, means a thousand pages in Italian, blank pages waiting to be filled. I feel compelled to fill these pages and to unravel the history that separated husbands from wives and children from parents. I write to understand the journey of immigrants, but more importantly, to understand who I am within this tribe that I call family. At Stonecoast, I recognized that I had neglected the “me” in memoir. Today, my writing strives to bring an authentic self on the page.
My extensive career in healthcare included communication, grant writing, marketing, and writing for healthcare journals. I thought these tools would prepare me for Stonecoast; however, I was wrong. Creative writing is hard, solitary, and humbling work.
Is there an author who has most profoundly influenced your work?
Sorry, I can’t limit my response to one author. Meredith Hall’s memoir, a raw account of exile and the journey toward resilience, left its mark. I am drawn to Mary Karr’s work and her ability to show compassion for her characters, even when they have failed her. I can laugh and cry along with her. Townie by Andre Dubus III and Another Bull Shit Night in Suck City by Nick Flynn hooked me. I love the gritty voices, life in working-class towns, and the transformation of characters in these stories. These authors influenced my voice as I write about a teenaged girl growing up in a gritty city.
Why did you choose Stonecoast?
I enrolled in a second workshop led by Susan Conley through MWPA. Susan inspired me to write more and encouraged me to apply for Stonecoast. I researched low-residency programs and learned that Stonecoast had a solid reputation, flexible schedules, and a strong sense of community. These were essential elements as I was balancing a full-time career while caring for medically fragile parents. Despite my initial anxiety about whether I could meet the Stonecoast commitment, it was the right decision. Each residency encouraged me to delve deeper into my writing, to read with a writer’s perspective, and to be present for my peers. I have learned to be less judgmental, to appreciate the courage of writers and the power of our stories.
What is your favorite Stonecoast memory?
I was like a deer in highlights in my first semester. Maybe it was anxiety or a lack of preparation, but I recall going to the wrong room and sitting through a presentation in a fog. Twenty minutes went by before I realized my mistake, but I was too self-conscious to walk out. I thankfully got grounded with a connection to the Coastal Girls: Mimi, Rickey, Andrea and Colleen, first-semester, creative non-fiction peers. We ate, danced, laughed, and encouraged each other throughout all five semesters; a friendship that sustains me today.
What do you hope to accomplish in the future?
The COVID-19 pandemic is certainly influencing my priorities today. I plan to work less, play hard, and write more. As for writing, my memoir is not the story I set out to write; it is the story that chose me. I intend to complete this work; perhaps, changing it to autofiction. I will also continue to develop my writing skills and explore the world of prose and poetry. Of course, we write to be read, and I hope to publish one of my pieces.
If you could have written one book, story, or poem that already exists, which would you choose?
The Maximus Poems by Charles Olson. I discovered this poet while researching genealogy and learned he lived in the former home of my grandfather in a waterfront tenement in Gloucester’s old Fort. His epic work contains three hundred poems varying in length from a single line to ten pages. I have no background in poetry; however, Charles Olson’s work had a strong emotional impact on me and my writing. This poet continues to circle me like a gull.
Featured Work
The following is a work of creative non-fiction by Mia Millefoglie exclusively for Stonecoast Review.
Fish Tales
And Olsen, they now tell me,
is carting fish, for Gorton-Pew,
the lowest job, Gloucester,
the job we all started with
Charles Olson
It was the summer of ’68, and Life magazine flooded us with images of Vietnam, hippies, and all kinds of protests. Everyone was marching about something, but I was too busy fretting about my body. I had this fantasy about high school that handsome boys will walk me to classes; I would go to prom and wear a sequined dress: I would be thin, flirty, and free. None of this happened.
“You’re not fat, you’re chunky,” Mom said. “Sei uno pezzo.”
She always said my body was one piece—a log— and I never thought that was a compliment. She also predicted I would grow up to look like Rosa, my older cousin, who was flat-chested and carried her weight in her stomach and hips. I didn’t want to look like Rosa, and I didn’t want to be called “chunky” anymore. Maybe Mom was tired of hearing me complain, or perhaps she really thought I was too fat. I never asked, but before summer’s end, I had an appointment with Dr. Curtis. She was our family physician who took care of me when I got the measles and gave Valium to Mom when her headaches kept her on the couch too long. Mom and I sat in the waiting room and flipped through magazines that neither of us read. Finally, the receptionist said, “Doctor will see you now.” When I entered the room, Dr. Curtis rose from behind her mahogany desk and greeted me, smiling. I didn’t smile back. Her black hair was pulled into a tight bun, and her white coat matched the color of the walls. I sat at the edge of a black examination table with fluorescent lights glaring down at me. Mom sat in a chair and said nothing. I felt cold and exposed as Dr. Curtis completed her exam.
“Maria is 145 pounds, height 5’4,” she said motioning me to step off the scale. “Everything else is normal.”
I never asked her what normal meant, but I must have scored abnormally on the fat scale. Dr. Curtis handed me a list of allowable foods and beverages—not to exceed 1000 calories a day—and a “little helper” called Dexedrine. I taped the list to our refrigerator until it became etched in my brain.
Breakfast: Black coffee, ½ grapefruit, ½ cup skim cottage cheese, toast.
Lunch: Diet soda, plain salad, ½ cup tuna or 1 boiled egg, 1 fruit
Dinner: 4 oz. Steak or chicken, steamed vegetables, and 1 fruit.
Snacks: Carrots and celery. 1 small apple or citrus fruit.
No oil, no sugar, no salty snacks
I wasn’t sure how many Dexedrine pills I was supposed to take, but it didn’t matter since my prescription was easily renewable. When I felt hungry, I would take a few green pills, which kept me from eating, and often kept me from sleeping. I lost twenty pounds that summer, but I didn’t lose the feeling of being chunky.
***
Summer started with lots of beach time and hanging out with my girlfriends, hoping to get a sighting of one of our latest boy crushes. The guys called the four of us the West End Girls. We hung out on the west side of town with the old Fort in its belly and Pavilion Beach—Pollution Beach to locals—on its borders. We walked the streets, pretending we had somewhere important to go, but we were aimless and clueless; that is, until Mom made another plan.
“Maria,” pausing as she rinsed our dinner plates, ‘you gotta work this summer.”
“Mom, I’m already babysitting every weekend. ” I feared my summer plans would come to an end.
“Not enough. I gotta keep you off the streets and away from boys!”
“Mom, I don’t even have a boyfriend.”
“You’re gonna pack fish this summer.”
“Ma, this is my last summer before high school!” I pleaded.
“You’re old enough to work,” Mom said, not buying into my plead.
“You go pack fish and stink at the end of the day,” I yelled with all the might of a teenager under her mother’s roof.
“It’ll do you good,” She said with a satisfied smirk and went back to washing dishes.
Mom sent me to the old Gorton-Pew—the fish plant in the Fort. It spewed the smell of rotten fish and roared from grinding machines that kept the neighborhood sleepless at night. The neighbors complained, but no one listened. The Fort was a broken-down neighborhood with Sicilian immigrants trying to make a living from the sea. Fishermen sold their catch at pennies a pound and were losing ground to foreign fleets. Families were losing too. Our first home, along with other neighboring triple-deckers, was torn down to make space for this plant’s delivery trucks.
On my first day, the Boss handed me a sharp knife and never said another word. I stood next to Josie, who cut fish in the plant and grew poppies at her home in the Fort. She was fast with her knives as she slashed the heads and tails of mackerel sloshing in the bins.
I tried to imitate Josie as she held the slimy mackerel down with the palm of her left hand. She brought the blade down swiftly slicing through skin and flesh. The knives scared me, and my fish just kept sliding off the conveyor belt. Josie complained to the boss man that this was no place for a fourteen-year-old who let the mackerel slip through her fingers like silk.
No one ever said I was fired, but the next day I had a new job at Lippmann’s, a herring plant on the State Pier. I never learned how my mom managed to find these jobs so quickly, but her drive to keep me away from boys must have been intense.
The fish plant was cavernous, dark, and cold. I took my place at the packing station—a gray metal platform with two rows of tightly packed girls and women. We faced each other like a firing squad, but our eyes never met. Instead, we looked down at the metal rolling station that separated us. We worked with downcast eyes and two hands reaching for fish that sloshed with blood and guts in a stream of frigid seawater. Our hands moved quickly, stacking one-row fillet up, next row fillet down, corners tight, and repeating this pattern until our boxes were packed to the rim. There was an intricate rhythm to this madness. Our boxes rolled down the belt to the men at the end of the line. They smoked as they weighed, and laughed as they carted our work away. They were the fish carters, and “not the lowest job, Gloucester.” I wanted that job. Fish packers were the lowest jobs in Gloucester, and I was one of them.
I worked with girls and women whose dreams were mangled like fish in nets. I learned to survive, to live inside my head, to fantasize that I was not at this fish plant. I learned that if I sang all my favorite Grateful Dead songs, ninety minutes would pass. I did division and math in my head. And when I glanced up, the boss man would be glaring down. He sat in a glass-enclosed station perched close to the ceiling, looking down at us. I hated this fucking packing place and hated even more that my mom thought this was good enough for me.
My summer days started at 5:00 a.m., and I dressed in a uniform of worn jeans, a sweatshirt, black rubber boots, and a red bandana around my head. It felt like preparing for war. My aunt, Zi Zi Maria, arrived at 5:20 a. m. in her Chevy and summoned me with one short blast of her horn. She kept the engine running, eyes straight ahead, with hands gripped to the steering wheel for a quick take-off.
This was our routine until one hot summer day in August. I jumped in the car and said my customary “Ciao Zia.”
“Hai mangiato?” My aunt tilted her head toward the back seat where a metal, rectangular box overflowed with Italian cookies.
“I’m not hungry,” I said, staring at more than two hundred cookies in the back seat. There were biscotti filled with almonds and anisette cookies topped with sprinkles, but I just didn’t feel like eating.
“Zi, what’s going on?” We had enough cookies for a celebration, and she looked like she was going to a wedding.
She wore a brightly colored V‑neck dress that cinched her waist and gold jewelry that must have weighed about five pounds. A thick gold chain with a gold cross and medals of her patron saints—Santa Rosalia, and the Saints Anthony and Christopher—decorated her chest. Her lips were painted in bright pink. Most workdays, she dressed in my uncle’s wool pants and red flannel shirts.
“Zi!” I tried again for some explanation, but her blue eyes pierced through me.
“Mangia!” Eat she told me, but she meant for me to shut up.
We entered the Lippmann Herring Factory with Zi Zi Maria’s arm around my waist, then walked toward the conveyor belt with the fish packers already at the station. I waved good-bye and watched her climb the metal steps that led to a small, platform close to the ceiling. She climbed the steps slowly with her shoulders back, and her head held high. Zi Zi had pulled on a pair of black wool pants under her dress, and men’s rubber boots replaced her shoes. A heavy rubber apron, the color of dead skin, protected her clothes, and a bright red scarf covered her hair. This armor didn’t protect her from the mocking spray of the guys who pummeled cold water throughout the plant. They hosed down fish and cuts, and any worker who stood in their way. She pulled on thick, textured gloves that would one day prove useless; the day she lost two fingers in the cutting blades. But today, she reigned strong and undefeated. She was a fish-cutter.
Boss said we had to cut, pack, and deliver over 100,000 lbs. of herring before day’s end. He worried about the sweltering heat, and I worried that we would be working into the night. Within an hour of the morning shift, I heard Zi Zi yelling, “shut the water” to the maintenance guys.
I looked up, and the water continued gushing, and she was still cutting the heads and tails of fish that descended down her chute.
“Shut the water off!” My aunt’s voice rose above the roar of cutting machines. The water was turned off, and the machines came to a grinding halt. Silence now filled our space. She removed her apron, marched down the ladder toward the packing station, and ordered all of us, “Outside now.”
“Why?” I asked.
“It’s mug-up time,” she said as she strode toward the door.
I followed her to the front lot, a worn-out pier filled with discarded fishing gear, broken planks, and seagulls feasting on decaying fish. I squinted, trying to adjust to the glaring sunlight and the scene in front of me. A mob of workers drank coffee from tall thermoses and helped themselves to Zia’s heaping pile of cookies.
A radio blasted music, and my aunt sang along to one of her Napolitano favorites when Mr. Lippman, a portly, red-faced man and the owner of the plant, came toward us.
“Everyone, get back to work,” he yelled, jumping up and down with fists clenched in the air.
My Aunt took notice, stopped singing, crossed her arms against her chest, and faced him one-on-one.
“We no go back to work.” She dismissed him with her customary Italian flip of the wrist under the chin. “We want a union!”
Mr. Lippmann’s face was noticeably redder, and I was afraid he would have a heart attack. I didn’t like the man, but I also didn’t want him to drop dead. I also didn’t want my aunt to get in any more trouble. At that moment, a burly man with a clipboard appeared from the back of the fish plant. He strode toward Mr. Lippmann, stared him down, and announced, “I’m Lou, and I’m with the AFL-CIO. These workers want a union.”
My aunt, Lou, and Mr. Lippman walked back into the fish plant, and we got some time in the sun. We returned to work that afternoon with a contract that guaranteed eight-hour workdays, a lunch hour, two fifteen-minute breaks, a women’s bathroom, and overtime pay.
Seven years later, this experience inspired me to organize with the AFL-CIO and lead a union campaign for women office workers at Boston College. But on that day, I just felt proud that my aunt had the guts to take on the bosses, fight for our rights, and change the rules of the game between the Boss and the workers in the herring plant.
Maria “Mia” Millefoglie’s early years were in Gloucester, Massachusetts where she was raised by her Sicilian family. She remains connected to her Sicilian roots and her family living in Sicily. As an adult, one relationship brought her to Maine; another relationship keeps her there. She lives with her husband Bill by the river in Kennebunk, Maine. Mia will go anywhere and do anything to spend time with her three sons, wives and partners, and two grandsons. Writing is central to her work and life. Her background includes social work, advocacy, and management in the non-profit healthcare sector. She has published a book on eldercare, and articles on telehealth technology and health care. Stonecoast marks a return to the University of Southern Maine. She is enrolled in creative non-fiction, is a reader for Stonecoast Review, and looks forward to graduation in 2020.